TMI Tuesday: Blankity Blank Blank

man pushing pencil_tmi

1. My best friend is _____ .

an absolute treasure.

2. An _____  lover is all I _____ .

attentive, communicative, intuitive; need.

3. If you only know one thing about me it should be _____ .

I am a walking ode to duality.

4. _____  are the best _____  in the world.

Snuggles; thing

5. A man and _____  walk into a bar and _____ .

a woman; have a screaming orgasm. After, she had a glass of mineral water.  (boooo… hiss. I couldn’t think of shit to say here).

6. I like to eat _____  in fall.

pumpkin EVERYTHING

Bonus:  I can’t _____  if it rains but I can _____ .

stop it; dance in it.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link totmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

 

TMI Tuesday: Queen of the Night

night_tmi
Fill in the blank

1. When I can’t sleep I _____ .

Take a long, scalding shower; soak in a bath; go swimming; go walking; go driving; dance around the house; read a book; have sex; masturbate; write; listen to music; watch late night infomercials; put on a favorite movie.

2. My dream bedroom would be full of _____ .

Pillows. Lots and lots of pillows. Soft, beautiful, big pillows. And blankets of all different warm, snuggly fabrics. Maybe some mirrors… and some lovely dim lights. I’d definitely have a fireplace and a big, fluffy rug to lay on in front of it.

3. If I could wake up anywhere tomorrow it would be _____ .

Any country in Europe. In a gorgeous hotel or a cabin by some water… someone’s house that they rent out during all the seasons except for summer… lovely and well-kept and secluded. Somewhere where there would be a chance of snow.

4. I need to _____  at night.

Cuddle. I never want to cuddle more than when it is dark outside.

5. _____ would truly be a nightmare.

Never having sex again.

6. Night time is the right time to _____ .

Bonus:  Briefly tell us about your last dream–erotic or not.

In my last dream… I was a tiny girl, no more than 6 inches tall, and I was swinging on a perch in a bird cage while Sir was reaching in to stroke and poke at me through the bars.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: Then and Now

Sex: Then & Now

sex tmi
1. Do you think sex is less important after age 50? Why or why not?

No. I don’t think sex has anything to do with age. I hope after 50 I’m still fucking and sucking my way to glory.

2. Were you ever squeamish about sex? At what age (or age range)?

Uhm, noooope.

3. When did you quit being squeamish and start to relax and enjoy sex?

N/A.

4. What is sex worth to you?

Worth to me? I’m not sure if the question is actually computing in my brain. Sex is wonderful. I’d give up cheesecake for sex.

5. What do you seek in exchange for sex?

Sex isn’t really something I bargain with? When I have sex I’m not seeking an exchange, I’m seeking mutual gratification.

6. Is your sex life better or worse now vs. five years ago? Why?

Better. I’m not attached to an asshole anymore.

7. Would you answer your mobile phone (a call or text) if it rang/dinged while you were having sex?

I have for various reasons: I was supposed to be at work while I was having sex, I recognized the ring tone as someone who only calls me in emergencies, etc.

Bonus: What is the one thing you wish your love interest understood about you?

the main thing I’d want a love interest to understand about me is that beneath my rough exterior, I am deeply sensitive, highly romantic, hyper emotional… and I love to cuddle.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: Serious Business Pants: ON.

Let’s Get Serious

tmituesday serious

1. What are you most afraid of?

Drowning, dying… abandonment.

2. Do you believe in life after death?

I’d really like to believe in reincarnation. That life goes on.

3. What is your purpose?

My purpose is to help people.

4. Where are you going?

Wonderful places.

5. Do you fear hell? Why or why not?

I don’t believe in hell. And if I did, I certainly wouldn’t fear it. They’d have a place reserved for me.

6. Do you feel free?

Some days… I feel free as a bird riding thermals.

Bonus: Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don’t point to their crotch when asking where is the bathroom?

I’ve seen people point to their crotch when asking for the bathroom.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: The Ways You Paint Me

Color is everywhere–nature, food, clothing, skin, animals. Different colors symbolize or mean different things in different cultures. Finally, color affects mood.

Rainbowtmi

From your life, tell us about an object, experience or idea related to each of the colors of the spectrum:

1. Red:
The way I burn for him and him alone. Flames that consume me, threatening to fill my lungs and drown me in heat… the hue of my cheeks when he says beautiful or filthy words to me… the colour that his hand leaves behind on my skin.

2. Orange:
His vivacity… the way he makes me laugh on a bad day, even when I think no one else can…
3. Yellow:
The bruises ten days later, still marring my thighs and cheeks and feet… reminding me of lessons learned and the sweet pleasure that comes from the torment of pain… the way I feel when a coworker comments on my marks and I’m scrambling for an answer because I couldn’t possibly tell them what a depraved girl I have been…
4. Green:
The impossible feeling of jealousy when other eyes move over him, sizing him up, taking in all that he is, coveting what I want to  only be mine…
5. Blue:
The unfathomable depths of his eyes, all at once beautiful and terrible, all-knowing and unknowable, full of passion and longing, stern with command, dominance, dark and light, reflecting winter storms and snow clouds, bleeding out intensity that stops me in my tracks…
6. Violet:
What it feels like to hear him speak in his mother tongue to me in quiet moments of intimacy, voice husky, raspy, dark… growling out the syllables in beautiful lyricism and desperate intonation… and even the words I do not yet know the meaning of… I can hear the melody… I know the song…

 

Bonus: What is the color of sex?
Golden, like stars exploding behind my eyes, supernovas, while you whisper sweet and dirty nothings, the need in your voice makes a fire move through me and when you plead with me to whisper your name… *your* name and no one else’s, only yours because that is who and what I am—yours… molten, shining gold, like the way I feel when you tell me in the middle of sex how beautiful and desirable I am, even if in that moment, I struggle to believe it, I know your words are true because you’re saying them… honeyed bronze like the colour of your hair, and like the way I feel, glowing from the inside out with an ethereal light, like I am precious because you are so deep inside of my body and my mind, how I could not be…

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: Even More Odds and Ends

 

tmi discuss mike meyers

1. What do you collect?

I know I’ve answered this before, but I cannot remember what I answered, and that’s okay! Because I collect quite a few things. So a few more things I collect: vinyl, postcards, shoes, Harley Quinn and Joker memorabilia, and recently: mosquito bites -.-

2. What do you do for fun?

I watch movies, I go out with friends and drink and dance, I travel, and various other activities.

3. Name a place that’s fun for you to visit but you wouldn’t want to live there.

I loved visiting London but I don’t think I’d want to live there in spite of loving big cities.

4. Do you believe in revenge?

I understand both the concept and the desire, however, I believe more in Karma.

5. Do you believe in forgiveness and do you forgive and forget?

Forgiveness is the hardest thing I’ve learned. And I can forgive now, however… I never forget.

6. Are you religious? spiritual? Atheist?

As the product of a house of warring and vastly different doctrines/beliefs, one of which being devout Roman Catholicism, I often say that I am a recovering Catholic. Spiritual pragmatist, Syncretic Agnostic, and deeply confused and disillusioned are all good terms that describe my personal belief system as well. I should mention that I am also highly critical of organized religion, specifically when it worms its way into politics or government processes. However, I’ve also been studying religion for years and I find it fascinating.

Overall… I have a very complex relationship with religion.

Bonus: What’s your routine every night just before you go to sleep?

If I don’t pass out first… I usually drink a glass of water, wash my face, brush my hair, brush my teeth, change into something comfortable/get naked, masturbate/get  fucked and then tuck in with music on or a movie on.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: Business as Usual

All Up In Your Business…

gladys-kravitz

1. What is the one word, in your vocabulary, that you use excessively? Don’t know…ask your friends and family.

“Like” and “fuck” haha. I’m such a lady.

2. If you had to have a sex change, what part of your body would you want enhanced more than anything else?

If I had to have a sex change to a man? C’mon. I’d want a big dick, of course.

3. You are not having a sex change, what part of your body do you want enhanced?

Man. I’d want someone to shave my shoulders down or make my ass smaller. That would be great.

4. When was the last time you felt possessive about someone?

I dunno… today… maybe? Yesterday? Who knows. I always feel pretty possessive over Sir, but not actively jealous.

5. When was the last time you got a wedgie and had to remove it in public?

I have honestly never done this… and would never. If this ever happened I would wait till I could get to a bathroom—sometimes I *am* a lady.

6. If the world froze for an afternoon and only you could move and no one could see you or remember what you did, what would you do?

Troll everyone/all the pranks. Rob a bank maybe? Run naked through the streets. Who knows? The world would be my oyster!

Bonus: What is your favorite sex toy of 2014?

Oh, definitely the Wahl or the speculum.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: the Three Ls

Love, Life, and Lessons

1. Are you happy with your job? Why or Why not?

I’m happier with my current job than I have been with other jobs. However, it’s still a job and not my intended career, so my dissatisfaction is more peripheral and in the background then actively hating it.

2. What do you want?

Right now, I would really like some sleep, please.

3. Who first broke your heart?

A well meaning man who didn’t realize how fragile I was.

4. What is the biggest mistake you’ve made in a relationship?

Staying in a shit show instead of hightailing it out.

5. What did you learn from you last lover/ex-significant other?

My last ex? If they don’t adore you, they don’t deserve your love or your tears.

6. What novel has been instrumental in shaping your views at any point in your life? Why?

Ender’s Game saga—written by a homophobic/racist dick, but the ideals presented in the book set me on the path I am on now.

7. Tell us about a favorite TV broadcast show you currently enjoy? Give us a synopsis of the show.

Doctor Who. An alien travels through time and space with human companions getting into hijinks.

Bonus: What is your current favorite song to listen to over and over again?

I’ve been listening to Dangerous by Big Data ft. Joy Wave on repeat for a couple of days now.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: the Sexy Things we Do and Say

tmi_aug 26

1. Close your eyes and think about having sex with your lover. Now, what was the first image that came to your mind? Was it foreplay? What kind of sex? What position? Where?

The lecture theatre at my job. On the long conference table that dominates the “stage” area. No one else is there, or watching, it’s late, it’s quiet, no one in the building except for maybe security. The lights are dim in the theatre, except for the bright overhead lights over the table. I’m on my hands and knees on the table and he’s fucking me from behind. His palms are flat and wide, sliding up my back, stroking my skin, up into my hair, massaging my scalp, using my hair to tug me up to him, he’s biting and kissing my shoulders, his tongue is tracing my tattoos, his free hand is wrapped around my body, arm resting against my hip bone, fingers stroking the sweet space between my thigh and my pelvis, right where the joint connects… he’s whispering… whispering… and I can’t quite make out the words but the idea of what they could be makes me shiver.

2. What is that most memorable thing that you or your partner said immediately after sex?

Heh. There’s usually a lot of mumbling and sighing and and whimpering and “you okay, baby?” and “thank you, Sir/Daddy” and “that was so good.” We’re both usually pretty worn and we talk a lot during… sooooooo, yea.

3. Whether reward or punishment, a part of your body must be shown on a huge billboard in the heart of your city/town. Which body part will you select to be 14 feet tall by 48 feet wide (4.27 meters x 14.63 meters)?

My calves.

4. You are about to lose your power of speech, what’s the one thing you would want to tell someone before that happens?

No matter who I was around, I’d more than likely say: I love you–because it’s one of the most beautiful things you can say to someone and if I could never say it aloud again, that’s what I’d want to say.

5. You are stricken with a disorder that causes you to blurt out a single phrase every time you orgasm? What is that phrase?

Just for shits and giggles I’d want it to be “the Lannisters send their regards!” or “Winter is coming!” —-(Whatcha think, Sir? =P)

Bonus: If you had to make out with a friend (same sex or opposite sex) to save the world from mass destruction, whom would you pick?

I’ll assume Sir isn’t an option and go with ANY of my hot lady blogger friends. 😉

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: Bar Fly

Time for fun and cheesy pick up lines at TMI Tuesday Happy Hour

happy-hour

At the TMI Tuesday bar someone walks up to you and utters the following lines, Tell us how you would respond.

1. Would you like to fake an orgasm with me tonight?

I don’t fake orgasms, but I do break hearts.

2. Did you just fart because you are blowing me away?

The daycare is around the corner.

3. You’re hot. I’m ugly. Let’s make average babies. (Would you accept?)

You’ll have to file the proper papers for that.

4. I’d like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

They don’t respond well to strangers.

5. You must work at Subway, ’cause you just gave me a footlong.

Looks more like a kiddie sub to me.

6. You look like a hard worker, I have an opening you can fill.

I would totally use this line on someone. No but seriously, I want to use it on someone tomorrow night.

7. I don’t feel good, I think I need a shot of penis-illin.

This is lame. I hope a guy would laugh at a woman who was using this seriously.

8. If I told you I worked for UPS, would you let me handle your package?

I would say this jokingly to Sir every day of the week bahahaha.

Bonus:  Belly up to the bar. What’s your pleasure? Which one drink would you order and why?

Slippery Nipple
No one can miss the innuendo in this drink’s name. It is comprised of equal parts Bailey’s Irish Cream and butterscotch schnapps. There are many different drink names that start with ‘Slippery’, most contain either Bailey’s Irish Cream or butterscotch schnapps.

After Sex
This drink is made with vodka, crème de bananas, and orange juice.

Leg Spreader
Not for the faint of heart, there is nothing but liquor in this drink. It is made of four equal parts of nothing but alcohol: tequila, vodka, gin, and rum. Proceed with caution!

All Night Long
The inference in this name is probably what most people wish for, but one or two or these will have you passed out on the floor all night long. It contains sweet and sour mix, coconut rum, Kahlua, crème de cacao, and pineapple juice.

Sloe Comfortable Screw
There are many drinks that play upon the pronunciation of sloe gin—pronounced slow gin. The rest of the name is a pun on all the other ingredients as well, to create a name that is as suggestive as you could want. Sloe gin for ‘slow,’ Southern Comfort for ‘comfortable,’ and orange juice and vodka for ‘screw’—as in a Screwdriver.

 

no, no, no. None of these. My sexual innuendo drink of choice is and always will be a screaming orgasm. Vodka, Bailey’s, and Kahlua. BUT you need quality vodka or the Bailey’s will just be unpalatable. So at least Grey Goose/Belvedere quality. Though, the best top shelf Vodkas I’ve ever had the pleasure of trying are definitely Snow Queen and Heavy Water, in case you were wondering.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!